This past weekend I joined a friend to witness his first scrutiny at Mass as he prepares to enter the Church. It was a beautiful moment, but unfortunately it was clouded by something that happened later on during communion.
I approached, as I normally do, to receive Our Lord on my tongue. My “Amen” was met with a stern look by the extraordinary minister of Holy Communion as he shook his head and gestured “on the hand.” A bit confused and shocked, I once again tried to gesture that I wanted to receive on the tongue. This was once again met with a severe shaking of the head and a refusal to give me communion. After asking him if he was denying me communion, I reverently bowed and walked back to my pew.
After Mass, the man approached me about this to correct me. I couldn’t help but answer by citing the General Instruction of the Roman Missal 161 which states (emphasis added):
If Communion is given only under the species of bread, the Priest raises the host slightly and shows it to each, saying, The Body of Christ. The communicant replies, Amen, and receives the Sacrament either on the tongue or, where this is allowed, in the hand, the choice lying with the communicant. As soon as the communicant receives the host, he or she consumes the whole of it.
My response was of no avail and the gentleman persisted in stating that I was in the wrong.
This event unfortunately stayed with me for the rest of the day. I was angry, confused, and, most of all, heartbroken. I felt empty, as though I had been abandoned.
Though unjust, this served as an important reminder to me of what Lent and the Triduum will bring. Jesus himself was abandoned. He was left alone to suffer and his closest friends were nowhere in sight.
My situation was nowhere near that. But in the midst of that moment, the least I could do was let this pain be my spiritual communion. And through that, I saw a glimpse of Easter.
Ultimately, something that initially took me further from Christ made me experience him more deeply. Plus, the next day when I did receive communion, I embraced him that much more.